Coin Machine Journal

February, 193s
THE COIN M A C H IN E
Cheer
JOURNAL
117
R o b o te e rs
\
o e%
A.
L?
W)
If women revive the bustle in
fashion, why can’t men do it in
business?
f (y/?i ’EEHE~
m a k in ' th e iwdst o p a p e n n y . . .
It has been said that the near­
est thing to perpetual motion is a
Jew chasing a Scotchman for a
debt.
A group of Chinese boys were
discussing the relative merits of
the two billboards, one advertis­
ing Carnation Milk and the other
Bull Durham. One of the boys
was explaining the signs to the
other in this way: “In America
they have he cows and she cows.
The she cow gives the milk and
the he cow gives the tobacco.”
One of the hardest things*in
life is to look pleased and sur­
prised when opening a bridge
prize.
J u s t >.
a M i nute
Nowadays it isn’t clothes that
make a man, it’s his car.
A D Y - I THINK.
lY R .O LU E D
Just because a girl has a run
in her stocking and a dash in her
eye, it is no sign she’s fast.
^ N D E R UERB
The teacher asked little Mary
what the function of the stomach
is, to which she promptly re­
plied: “To hold up the petti­
coat.”
The world is a looking-glass,
and gives back to every man the
reflection of his own face. Frown
at it, and it in turn will look
sourly at you; laugh at it and it
is a jolly, kind companion.
“Dad, what is a peace-offer­
ing?” “That all depends, my
boy, it can be anything from a
box of candy to a fur coat.”
“Have you ever had static on your
radio?”
Novice: “No, but we’ve had Los
Angeles and Cuba, and I am sure we
could get static if we wanted to bad
enough.”
My wife is the thinnest woman you
have ever seen. She’s afraid to eat apples
because she thinks they will show.
"Martie,” said mother sorrowfully,
"every time you are naughty, I get an­
other gray hair.”
"My word!” replied Bertie, "you must
have been a terror. Look at grand-dad!”
Home may lose its popularity,
but there’ll never be a substitute
as a comfortable place to eat
com on the cob.
Beggar—Please, mister, give a poor
blind man a dime.
Operator—Why, you can see out of
one eye.
Beggar—Well, then, give me a
nickel.
_______
Harry—Jake, I am the best friend
you ever had. When Sarah said you
were not fit to eat with the pigs, I
took your part and said you were.
Hey Jim — Eddie Smith caught hay
fever from dancing with a grass widow.
Ike-—My brother is an oculist in a
kitchen.
Mike—What does he do?
Ike—He takes the eyes out of the
potatoes.
Smart Operator—Why is a bumble
bee like a counterfeit dollar?
Dumb Operator—I don’t know.
Why is it?
Smart Operator—Because it’s a
Humbug,
First Operator—My wife just got
a new baby.
Second Operator—How is your
wife?
First Operator—Oh, she’s holding
her own.
Missing—A gold watch by a lady with
a Swiss movement.
Father—Don’t you know that you
can’t support my daughter until you
go to work and earn a salary?
Suitor—Oh, I don’t want to sup­
port her; I only want to marry her.
"There’s too much eavesdropping go­
ing on around here,” said the operator
as he shook his fist at the pigeon.
Neighbor—Your husband’s bathing
suit was washed ashore.
Wife—Oh, he’ll buy another one.
Neighbor—Yes, but, your husband
was in it.
His Keeper—You will have to work
here, Johnny, but you may select any
trade you wish.
The Convict—Well sir, if it’s all the
same to you, I ’d like to be a sailor.
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