Music Trade Review
Issue: 1910 Vol. 51 N. 8 - Page 5
Music Trade Review -- © mbsi.org, arcade-museum.com -- digitized with support from namm.org
THE
MUSIC TRADE
IN LIGHTER VEIN
WHAT HE THOUGHT.—U'Anbist—Do you think my battle picture
expresses, as I have meant it to, all the poignant horrors of war?
Krittick—Oh, yes, it's the aw fullest thing 1 ever saw.—Tit-Bits
LOOKING UP.—-How's business?"
"Brisk," answered the druggist.
'Tve bought tickets for two picnics
and four excursions this morning, and donated goods for several indoor
affairs."—Pitlsburg Post.
AT Tllh: GOLF COM I'KTITION.—Flayer (Hearing the green) —
Can you see a lly in my eye, old chap?
Opponent—Oh, yes, I can see it. I'll take it out when you've played
your "approach"!—London Opinion.
SH1C KNKW.—"Now," said Mr. Bunker, who was instructing her in
the mysteries of golf, "you know what a 'tee' is. Now, then, the duties
of a caddie
"
"Oh! of course," she interrupted, "the caddy's what you put the tea in.
1 know what a tea caddie is."
A GROWING DOLLY.—"Mamma," said little Dorothy, "1 want
some water to christen my doll."
"No, dear," replied the mother, "it's wrong to make sport of such
things."
"Then 1 want some wax to waxinate her. She's old enough to have
something d
parishioners against looking at other men's wives, and offered a silk hat to
the man who would stand up and say that he had not so offended. One of
the confiding kind of husbands, when he got home, was innocently telling
his wife about it when she interrupted: "Of course, John, you got right up."
John apparently bad not anticipated a personal application, but he answered
guilelessly, "Of course not, Mary; you know how punky I look in a silk-
hat."—Puck.
IDKNTIKIKD.—A question in a recent examination on " 1 he Mer-
chant of Venice," m the Kvansville High School, was:
"Give three reasons why Shy lock hated Antonio.
One little girl wrote as one of her answers:
"Sbylock hated Antonio because he was a Republican."
The teacher was puzzled. Where could the child have gotten that idea?
Then she remembered that Shylock once said of Antonio, "How like a
fawning publican he looks!"
DIDN'T HAVE 'EM.—After he had waited outside for ten long min-
utes, the door was opened on the chain and a woman's face appeared at
the aperture.
"Good morning, madam," began the street hawker in bis suavest tones.
"I have here a little article of universal utility. It is called the Marvelous
Mice Exterminator, and the price
"
"No use." interrupted the woman, firmly. "We have no marvelous
mice in this house—only the ordinary kind."
Then the door was shut, and the hawker was once more alone.
LARGE AND RESPECTABLE.—Judge Alvin Duvall (while judge of
the Kentucky Court of Appeals), in company with Squire Johnson, a very
large man—the judge being much smaller—once called a political meeting
in Lexington, which for lack of adequate advertisement was attended by
themselves only. The distinguished judge, possessing a fund of quiet
humor, finally began to write a notice, reading aloud as he wrote: "At a
large and respectable meeting held in this city yesterday——•"
"Stop there a minute, judge," exclaimed the squire in surprise, "you
wouldn't publish a notice that this was a large and respectable meeting."
"Why not?" quickly rejoined the judge. "Are not you large and am I
not respectable?"—Nashville Banner.
"When Col. Bill Sterrett .first came to Washington as a correspondent,"
said Alfred Henry Lewis, "he was the most cantankerous rebel that was
ever seen. He was a green sprout from Kentucky, who represented a Texas
daily, with a side line of unreconstructed periodicals through the unre-
generate South. Sterrett's every breath was a defiance of the Union and an
insult to the Stars and Stripes. He secured desk room in the office of
old General Boynton of Cincinnati, who had been a Union brigadier. One
day a tall, lank, black-mustached, slouch-hatted individual came in and
whispered something in Boynton's ear. Boynton rose like a convulsion of
nature, turned the stranger around by a slap, and began kicking him. '[
kick you,' panted the general, "because you are.—a liar—and a—blackguard
—and a cur.'
"By and by the general ran out of breath and slowed up. Col. Bill
Sterrett, who had been sitting with his legs crossed in a corner of the
room, an interested watcher, called out: 'General, Ah wish vo' would do
me a favah, sub. Lennne kick him just once in memory of ouah her.oic
Confederate dead.' "
REVIEW
What
Every Dealer
Should Know
T
HAT the continued growth of the
player-piano is bringing ahout new
conditions and the ascendancy of this
specialized product has accentuated the de-
mand for specific information concerning it.
Where can information he gained which
will aid the player-piano husiness?
Think it over.
The subject interests every dealer.
Now, if interest in the player product is
permitted to languish, the player-piano in time
will be no more active than instruments of the
ordinary type.
It will be used at irregular intervals.
Interest on the part of owners of player-
pianos must at all times be stimulated.
People who have purchased them must be
acquainted with their marvelous possibilities,
and it is absurd to say that the player-piano
will take care of itself.
Kducation and enlightenment must be con-
stantly carried on by those directly interested.
Recognizing the demand for specific in-
formation, this trade newspaper organization
put forth The Player Monthlv, and it is con-
ceded that this magazine has been doing intel-
ligent, helpful work.
Dealers have purchased The Player Month-
ly in large quantities, realizing its helpfulness
to their interests by circulating it among peo-
ple interested in player-pianos.
The cost is but a trifle.
]>y the year, fifty cents.
Single copies, rive cents.
It is in tabloid form, and we shall take pleas-
ure in supplying sample copies free to those
who desire this aid to the player business.
Our position as specialists in this field is
conceded, for this newspaper institution is the
only one which has put forth technical and in-
structive literature relating to the player-
piano.
The Player Monthly is wiitten in a chatty,
understandable, up-to-date vein.
Read it, and you will see just what it means
to you and your business.
EDWARD LYMAN BILL
PUBLISHER
1 MADISON AVE., NEW YORK
THE
MUSIC TRADE
IN LIGHTER VEIN
WHAT HE THOUGHT.—U'Anbist—Do you think my battle picture
expresses, as I have meant it to, all the poignant horrors of war?
Krittick—Oh, yes, it's the aw fullest thing 1 ever saw.—Tit-Bits
LOOKING UP.—-How's business?"
"Brisk," answered the druggist.
'Tve bought tickets for two picnics
and four excursions this morning, and donated goods for several indoor
affairs."—Pitlsburg Post.
AT Tllh: GOLF COM I'KTITION.—Flayer (Hearing the green) —
Can you see a lly in my eye, old chap?
Opponent—Oh, yes, I can see it. I'll take it out when you've played
your "approach"!—London Opinion.
SH1C KNKW.—"Now," said Mr. Bunker, who was instructing her in
the mysteries of golf, "you know what a 'tee' is. Now, then, the duties
of a caddie
"
"Oh! of course," she interrupted, "the caddy's what you put the tea in.
1 know what a tea caddie is."
A GROWING DOLLY.—"Mamma," said little Dorothy, "1 want
some water to christen my doll."
"No, dear," replied the mother, "it's wrong to make sport of such
things."
"Then 1 want some wax to waxinate her. She's old enough to have
something d
parishioners against looking at other men's wives, and offered a silk hat to
the man who would stand up and say that he had not so offended. One of
the confiding kind of husbands, when he got home, was innocently telling
his wife about it when she interrupted: "Of course, John, you got right up."
John apparently bad not anticipated a personal application, but he answered
guilelessly, "Of course not, Mary; you know how punky I look in a silk-
hat."—Puck.
IDKNTIKIKD.—A question in a recent examination on " 1 he Mer-
chant of Venice," m the Kvansville High School, was:
"Give three reasons why Shy lock hated Antonio.
One little girl wrote as one of her answers:
"Sbylock hated Antonio because he was a Republican."
The teacher was puzzled. Where could the child have gotten that idea?
Then she remembered that Shylock once said of Antonio, "How like a
fawning publican he looks!"
DIDN'T HAVE 'EM.—After he had waited outside for ten long min-
utes, the door was opened on the chain and a woman's face appeared at
the aperture.
"Good morning, madam," began the street hawker in bis suavest tones.
"I have here a little article of universal utility. It is called the Marvelous
Mice Exterminator, and the price
"
"No use." interrupted the woman, firmly. "We have no marvelous
mice in this house—only the ordinary kind."
Then the door was shut, and the hawker was once more alone.
LARGE AND RESPECTABLE.—Judge Alvin Duvall (while judge of
the Kentucky Court of Appeals), in company with Squire Johnson, a very
large man—the judge being much smaller—once called a political meeting
in Lexington, which for lack of adequate advertisement was attended by
themselves only. The distinguished judge, possessing a fund of quiet
humor, finally began to write a notice, reading aloud as he wrote: "At a
large and respectable meeting held in this city yesterday——•"
"Stop there a minute, judge," exclaimed the squire in surprise, "you
wouldn't publish a notice that this was a large and respectable meeting."
"Why not?" quickly rejoined the judge. "Are not you large and am I
not respectable?"—Nashville Banner.
"When Col. Bill Sterrett .first came to Washington as a correspondent,"
said Alfred Henry Lewis, "he was the most cantankerous rebel that was
ever seen. He was a green sprout from Kentucky, who represented a Texas
daily, with a side line of unreconstructed periodicals through the unre-
generate South. Sterrett's every breath was a defiance of the Union and an
insult to the Stars and Stripes. He secured desk room in the office of
old General Boynton of Cincinnati, who had been a Union brigadier. One
day a tall, lank, black-mustached, slouch-hatted individual came in and
whispered something in Boynton's ear. Boynton rose like a convulsion of
nature, turned the stranger around by a slap, and began kicking him. '[
kick you,' panted the general, "because you are.—a liar—and a—blackguard
—and a cur.'
"By and by the general ran out of breath and slowed up. Col. Bill
Sterrett, who had been sitting with his legs crossed in a corner of the
room, an interested watcher, called out: 'General, Ah wish vo' would do
me a favah, sub. Lennne kick him just once in memory of ouah her.oic
Confederate dead.' "
REVIEW
What
Every Dealer
Should Know
T
HAT the continued growth of the
player-piano is bringing ahout new
conditions and the ascendancy of this
specialized product has accentuated the de-
mand for specific information concerning it.
Where can information he gained which
will aid the player-piano husiness?
Think it over.
The subject interests every dealer.
Now, if interest in the player product is
permitted to languish, the player-piano in time
will be no more active than instruments of the
ordinary type.
It will be used at irregular intervals.
Interest on the part of owners of player-
pianos must at all times be stimulated.
People who have purchased them must be
acquainted with their marvelous possibilities,
and it is absurd to say that the player-piano
will take care of itself.
Kducation and enlightenment must be con-
stantly carried on by those directly interested.
Recognizing the demand for specific in-
formation, this trade newspaper organization
put forth The Player Monthlv, and it is con-
ceded that this magazine has been doing intel-
ligent, helpful work.
Dealers have purchased The Player Month-
ly in large quantities, realizing its helpfulness
to their interests by circulating it among peo-
ple interested in player-pianos.
The cost is but a trifle.
]>y the year, fifty cents.
Single copies, rive cents.
It is in tabloid form, and we shall take pleas-
ure in supplying sample copies free to those
who desire this aid to the player business.
Our position as specialists in this field is
conceded, for this newspaper institution is the
only one which has put forth technical and in-
structive literature relating to the player-
piano.
The Player Monthly is wiitten in a chatty,
understandable, up-to-date vein.
Read it, and you will see just what it means
to you and your business.
EDWARD LYMAN BILL
PUBLISHER
1 MADISON AVE., NEW YORK
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