The Color and Artwork. First of
all, let me say that aquamarine blue
was not very imaginative for a
machine with a water motif .
I
mean, everybody does their sub
games in aquamarine blue . Since
Midway decided to include a
periscope, why didn't they innovate
with color. Tomato red would have
been different .
Anyway, blue
worked . Somehow, inexplicably, it
worked . I think . on close examina-
tion , it was the sea anemone that
saved it. It's the only distinctly
outstanding sea artifact : right there
on the front below the cash door is a
big flowery sea anemone. Or maybe
it's a cabbage? Who knows for
sure? Regardless, I somehow feel
this attention given by Midway's
artists to plant and animal life
sucked in the botany and biology
crowd . A shrewd move . Forget all
those dandy submarines pictured .
Every sub game's had them.
The Name.
The name was
cru cial.
Again , industry rumors
have it that " Sea Wolf" was not the
first choice . " Charlie the Tuna "
was . One of Midway's vice-presi-
dents, who shall go nameless, had
been impressed by Bally's use of
established entertainment stars to
promote " Wizard " and " Capt .
Fantastic ." He pushed, therefore,
for a tie-up with a " water-oriented "
star. " Lloyd Bridges" seemed like a
poor name for a machine . "Flipper"
had passed on to that great fishy
heaven in the sky some years back .
" Moby Dick" was unavailable,
unless you were willing to contrib-
ute a leg . So it came down to
" Charlie the Tuna ," who was very
commercial. Fortunately for Mid-
way, just when plans were about
set, somebody reminded this un-
named vice-president that " Charlie
the Tuna " was never chosen
because he had no class. The idea
was hastily scuttled and " Sea Wolf"
surfaced .
I understand it was
suggested by a night maintenance
man who read a lot of Jack London
during his coffee breaks .
The Sound.
Let's face it.
Midway blew the sound reproduc-
tion on the SW . Oh , the tonal
quality of the torpedo hissing, the
sonar pinging, the explosion of a hit
is fine, but, really who do they think
they' re kidding with that P.T . boat
sound ? I have a suspicion that the
sound engineers just threw in the
resistor here and said , " Let's
punt ." 7The sound of the P.T . boat
is definitely that of a laugh , not a
motor. The fact that people will
playa game which purports to be
realistic but whose primary target is
a laughing boat that sounds like
Phyllis Diller - well , perhaps the
comment of one customer getting
further change for a dollar typifies
the players' anger at such slip-shod
workmanship : ' 'I'm going to sink
that laughing little bastard if it takes
every cent I've got ."
The Targets. There are three
target ships on the SW: freighters,
warships, and P.T . boats. Much
has been made of the P . T . boat
because of its elusiveness . But the
freighters and warships should
receive their due. First of all , what if
they'd been labeled shrimp boats
and tramp steamers. The game
would have taken on a whole
different perspective! Secondly, the
slower speeds of these two targets
act like a baseball change-up 8 to
the player; and, fin~lIy , neither the
freighter nor warship laugh at the
customer which allows him to walk
away with some dignity and no
doubt has helped to cover up the
sound engineers' deficiency in the
case of the P.T. boat.
So that is the anatomy of the Sea
Wolf; and I believe its conclusion is
crystal clear: when looking for a
sure-fire winner of a game it should
resemble an upright coffin , contain
ball -bearings, not have the firing
button under the little finger, use a
pUll-out 6" step, paint a cabbage on
the front, not use the name "Charlie
the Tuna, " screw up the sound so
that one target laughs, and utilize a
change-up .
Don't blame me if that sounds
ridiculous; Midway did it and it's a
hell of a game!
1 Maria , heroine of The Sound of
Music , 1966, not hitherto known for
contributing to the game industry,
an oversight of most scholars.
2 From the Latin , ergo, ergas, ergat,
intransitive verb meaning to get the
picture .
3 I'm getting tired of repeating the
name . Henceforth to be referred to
as " SW. "
4 Notable Quotes That Don't Mean
a Damn Thing . Houghton, Mifflin ,
1958, p. 167.
5 Rumors, Rumors, What the Heck
Can You Believe? Ali , Muhammed,
Viking Press, 1973, p. 42 .
6 coup - not like chicken coop;
according to my Funk & Wag nails
it's from a French word that
originally meant a cuff on the ear.
Sounds 900d .
7 Quotation made famous by Vince
Lombardi while coaching Green Bay
Packers in 1964, Dallas game, 3rd
and long .
8 change-up - to wit :
a ball
delivered at an off-speed to mess up
the batter's timing ; Wit and Wisdom
of Sandy Koufax. Koufax , Sandy.
Playboy Press, 1973, pp . 22-24.
CLOSE·OUT.~I
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51