T h e A u t o m a t i c A ge
No Time for Play
The storm had swept some o f the
deck fittings overboard and things
looked so dubious ths cnptain decidcd
t -> send up a distress signal. Just
as he first rocket shot up into the
inky blackness of t'n3 nip-ht
fussy
little man spoke up: “ Captain, I don’t
want to| cast a damper on any man's
high spirits, but this seems like a
helluva time to be setting off fire
works.”
Anonymity
He: “ How did you keep your do
nation secret?”
She: “ I sent an anonymous check.”
Proverbs of Turkey
“ I f” and “ when” were planted, and
“ nothing” grew up.
Had Done Enough
“ Fellow citizens,” said the candi
date, “ I have fought against the In
dians. I have often had no bed but
the battlefield, and no canopy but the
sky. I have marched over the frozen
ground, till every step has been mark
ed with blood.
His story told well, tdl a dried-up
looking voter came to the front.
“ Did you say yer’d fought for the
Union?”
“ Yes,” replied the candidate.
“ And again the Indians?”
“ Yes, many a time.”
Orl Pebner
Editor, Druggist: Can you de
cipher this, we did, “ Oil Verbena” —
Clear as mud.
— Frank Scott, Roseland Pharmacy
The Patriot
“ What have you ever done to show
your patriotism.”
© International Arcade Museum
75
“ Well, I always shoot off two or
three dollars worth of firecrackers
every Fourth o f July.”
Freddy (who has eaten his apple):
“ Let’s play at Adam and Eve.”
Millie: “ How do we do that?”
Freddy: “ You tempt me to eat
your apple, and I give way.”— Edin
burgh Scotsman.
Contrary to the common impres
sion, most actual villain are not tall,
dark men, says Francis Carlin, a one
time famous Scotland Yard detective.
Records o f the Yard show that 76
per cent of the criminals convicted
are blonds, usually tall.
Hundreds o f sacks of wild rice
have been scattered by airplane over
the marshes in the Manitoba north
land to increase the food supply for
ducks and muskrats.
Athens, Greece, is known as the
“ City of the Violet Crown,” in ref
erence to the beautiful effects of sun
set light on the Acropolis.
The use of anaesthetics was taught
to other medical professions by den
tistry. The use of nitrous oxide,
laughing gas, in the extraction of
teeth, was first attempted by Horace
Wells in 1841.
A survey of tea and coffee imports
shows that more than 73,000,000 per
sons in the United States are tea and
coffee drinkers. Per capita consump
tion of coffee for 1926 was two cups
a day or 14 pounds a year, while that
of tea averaged one-half cup every
24 hours, or three-fourths o f a pound
for 12 months.
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