T he A
u t o m a t ic
CAN’T FOOL A HORSEFLY
The story is told of a negro from
the North who went South for the
first time. During his visit he, with
his host, went out over the pasture
lot, and a big fly started buzzing
around the northern negro’s head,
much to his annoyance.
“ Sam,” he inquired, “what am dis
heah fly you all sees buzzin’ ’round
mah head?”
“ That,” responded Sam, “ is a hoss
fly, what bothers hosses, an’ cows
and jackasses.”
“ Does you all mean to insinuate,
niggah, dat I’m a jackass?” the vis
itor inquired.
Diplomatic Sam hesitated not a
second but responded easily, “ I’se
passin’ no remahks,” he said, “and
I ain’t saying’ you all’s a jackass, but
dem flies don’ make no mistakes!”
LOST & FOUND
These ads are published without
charge unless the machine is re
covered when a charge of 50c is
made.
STOLEN— About February 15th, a
Watling 25c Bell, factory number
26988. Will pay rewards for infor
mation that will lead to return of
same. Geo. W. Coleman, 317 Elm
St., Rockford, 111.
A
ge
81
Prelude
A man was sitting by a hole in the
ice when a curious chap came over.
“Aren’t you cold?” asked the new
comer.
“Nope.”
“ Caught any fish?”
“ Nope.”
“ What are you waiting for?”
“ My partner. He’s down under the
ice looking things over.”
A Man of Parts
“ Where’s that dratted Simpkins?”
roared the boss. “ Some say he’s in
the credit department, some saw him
in the salesroom, some claim he's in
the warehouse.”
“ Well,” replied the secretary, “ you
know he’s an all-around man.”
If Necessary
“ If you had it to do over again,
would you marry me, dear?” asked
Mrs. Nash.
“ Of course,” answered her brute of
a husband, “------ if I had to do it over
______
again.”
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SPECIAL machine builders, tool and
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Ju.
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